‘WEAR ME’: Fashions Return To Wonderland

Throughout this last week of methodology drudgery, there has been a somewhat random quandary distracting my seriously badly behaved attention span. It was not what type of morally and hygienically challenged, socially inept person would appear on the much anticipated 1000th episode of Jeremy Kyle. No, this was a far more pressing issue that revolved solely (haha) and extremely seriously (obviously) on whether to sock, or not to sock? It was clear as I left the house for a Friday night date boldly sporting a pair of darling H&M floral socks perfectly visible through my suitably high, chunky heeled sandals that the answer was a resounding hell yeah.

For a while now nothing has pleased me more than the Alice In Wonderland inspired, ultra feminine styles that have bound like spring lambs into our wardrobes; giving even the most stolid female the refreshing desire to host a La Durée inspired tea party. Think ice cream pastels, ankle socks, sheer, draping material, rosy cheeks, a devilish smile and of course, ‘EAT ME’ Hummingbird cupcakes with Royal Albert bone china tea cups and saucers to match. As someone who still buys the cutesy beady hair clips from Accessories Angels (the erm...kids section), you can imagine, there is nothing that pleases me more than the entire fashion world realising the joy of embracing ones inner 10 year old.

The problem that I feel many of us will have with this trend is how far it can realistically be taken before people begin to shout ‘freak’ at you as you pirouette past them in Bloch point shoes, a Carrie inspired tutu, dame Edna pearls, a Princess Di tiara and Lady GaGa on t’other end of a Pinkberry wanting her obligatory tea cup back. Lest we forget, 10 years old - we are not (sorry girls). There is a limit as to how many of the floral cycling shorts, lace ankle socks and dungaree creations (see the WHOLE of Topshop for more details) we can wear without becoming a seriously misinformed problem to our nearest and dearest.

Unsurprisingly, it was the Andrew Lloyd Webber of the fashion editorial; Mario Testino, who provided me with the much needed grown-up inspiration that would prevent me from throwing the dummy out of the pram over how to pull off this potentially difficult trend. His ‘Girls Allowed’ shoot for a recent Vogue (think more draping pearls, ethereal curly locks and heavenly pastel shades than painful vocals, fake tan and cheating husbands), portrayed the kind of peaceful, otherworldly empowered serenity that can be achieved through this trend. The model wore silky bunny ears, high-necked lace, bold coral necklaces and ruffled layered skirts, yet the serious heel height combined with a deep and glinting eye suggested perfectly that there is far more to this look than candy floss sweetness and a ditsy smile.

This stunning collection of photographic genius taught me that this trend is absolutely NOT about revealing to the world ones inner Suri Cruise envies. Accessories must be intricate, make up minimal and heels high as the clouds you appear to have drifted down from. It is about embracing confident femininity that is light hearted, not politically charged. There is a respectable and well earned time and place for androgyny and boyish trends. We need look no further than the alternative trends this season to see that fashion is about diversity. But Spring/Summer for me this year will be about capturing the wonderland that is being offered and enjoying the moments in which I am allowed to be as sophisticatedly girly as I choose.

So, despite the fact that not for the first time, I managed to utterly bemuse Daniel, (who kindly reminded me that socks and sandal combos are ‘like...bad in fashion’), not for a while have I actually enjoyed an outfit as much as this and I would honestly and earnestly advise people to give it a go. Embrace the lace, the sheer fabrics, the pastels, the pearls, the jewels and the fresh faced appearance. Definitely host a tea party and ABSOLUTELY re-read Alice In Wonderland. It’s been a long, bitter winter and I can think of no better way to thaw out and put back the sorely missed spring in our steps than embracing fashion at its most fantastic and frivolous. After all, in the immortal words of the charming Alice ‘it’ll be a comfort – never to grow into an old woman’.

Do The Clothes Maketh The Woman?

Cheryl Cole (or Chezza as she has been so affectionately dubbed by myself and fellow witty friends), is the marmite celebrity of the moment x She has experienced a dazzling success, fuelled by a wicked concoction of big hair, a cracking smile, killer heels, a dusting of sequins and just a pinch (or 3) of bloody good luck x

This Girls Aloud sweetheart has undertaken a whirlwind journey from chavvy to chic (mostly) leaping from the coveted front cover of Vogue, to our Saturday night TV screens, to the hearts of the nation, with her totally endearing ‘heart-on-sleeve’ attitude x But in the words of my less convinced housemate, there are still people out there (perhaps with better memories...or maybe better hearing) groaning ‘I just don’t get it’ x

Lest we forget, this is a woman once better renowned for baseball cap, belly out, bathroom brawls than style, sophistication and a wardrobe many young women would give their right AND left arms for x This leads me to ponder upon what has provoked such a change in public opinion x Particularly in her current hour of need, when the majority of the public seem, rightly so, to be fully behind our Chezza x

So, how has she really swept many an unsuspecting man, woman and child off their feet at a pint sized 5ft 3?!? x Do we just all suffer from the selective memory condition that I frequently berate my father for, or has something more magical happened....something that even makes us pretend to our ears that the noise we are hearing is in fact a catchy, lovable tune rather than a struggling Geordie cat? X I really do believe that it is indeed a kind of magic, more specifically, a kind of fashion magic x

The last few years have seen our Chez transform from fashion disaster to fashion diva, even getting rid of the signature hair extensions and working a fashion forward edgier style x Outfit after glorious outfit has captivated audiences, transforming many a non-believer into not only a believer, but a diehard fan, buying the album because ‘you know, it’s really well produced’ and clicking unashamedly on the ‘Cheryl Cole’ tab on ASOS.com x fine, there have been some horrible omissions on Cheryl’s Starlight Express to fashion goddess (see Alexander McQueen 26th birthday dress) that remind us, much like the lovely ‘Mrs Cole’ tattoo on her neck, that perhaps there is still an inner chav waiting to bubble to the surface x but there has also been the fun Hervé Leger bodycons, the daring David Koma X-factor black and silver fan number, and the enviable Rupert Sanderson heels that she is rarely far away from x perhaps this is also why we love her x she is essentially a heartbreakingly normal lass who has the same taste in bad men and worse wardrobe choices, that we have undeniably all been guilty of at some point x

So there we have it, the utter magic of a perfect (well, nearly) wardrobe x the type of magic that makes us forget that Chez was once in court for attacking a toilet attendant, loved nothing better than a baseball cap, timberlands and combats and even makes us leave 10minutes late for our Saturday nights out risking flat hair and faded make up just to see what she’s wearing x I have no qualms in saying that if it were a dodgy fringe and bare belly that remained her look of choice, she would not be the darling that she is today x in Cheryl’s case then, the clothes have truly madeth the woman x through the magic of fashion we have seen her develop and mature into a woman whose songs we want to dance to, whose opinions we want to hear and whose wardrobe we seek to emulate x and as for all you non believers, I must just say one final thing...Come on girls....because she’s worth it. :) x

A Dose of Doctor Lagerfeld

Much to the disbelief (and quite likely despair) of Daniel, it has been my somewhat shallow, but lifelong dream to spend my first proper pay cheque on a Chanel bag x the new season quilted number below for example, would do just nicely x I’m not fussy you see x Now, the reason that Daniel despairs (in what I believe to be an over dramatic fashion), is because of course, this is no 10quid bag...no no x try £1000....plus x He genuinely marvels on why I would choose to pass on the horribly sensible things which inevitably come with having ones ‘first pay cheque’ e.g. food and water x and for some time, I’ve got to say I genuinely struggled to find a sensible explanation other than well...I just WANT one x Well ladies and gentleman...I have finally come up with my answer...and if I may say, it’s a bloody good one x Allow me if you will, to present my star witness...a Miss Lily Allen x

First noticed for her prom dresses and Jeremy Kyle jewellery, I never really thought Lily would become the fashion icon that she is considered to be today x In fact, I blame the oversized hollow gold heart shaped earrings I not only own, but wear regularly, on a certain Miss A...who knows...it might even be a knuckle duster with ‘Chaz’ embossed on it next...x Anyway, like it or not, the pop starlet who could once have passed for Bianca Jackson’s sister, is now as pretty as a picture and incredibly enviably, a face of Chanel x Never backwards about coming forwards, Lily has been an infamous blogger, from revealing personal insecurities to campaigning for anti piracy laws x This woman has a quick mouth and a witty opinion and she ain’t afraid to use it x There is of course, absolutely NOTHING wrong with this...but I believe that what Karl Lagerfeld gracefully described as her ‘typical English reserve’...was in fact good old fashioned misery x Her permanent faceache was boring to say the least and it comes to something when godfather to the stars Elton John has to dish out a public telling off...x That said, it has not gone unnoticed that of late, Lily has been an embodiment of happiness, something which she puts down to personal fulfilment and her ‘lovely’ boyfriend x I however, have a distinctly different theory to explain Lily’s recent turn around x and that is, her good ol’ dose of Doc. Lagerfeld x In the campaign shots, Lily is sultry, sassy and most importantly, smiling x Quite frankly, if being photographed by Karl Lagerfeld himself whilst holding copious Chanel bags looking like el rock chick supremo doesn’t make you happy, then I bloody do not know what would (I don’t have all the answers...) x I for one am pleased that Lily is smiling again, not as she first sung, through leaving a cheating boyfriend, but through glamorously exiting a Chanel Studio...laden with the bags that I so enviously covet...and hopefully the tiara too!

So there we have it x my EXTREMELY valid justification for wanting to spend my first month’s hard earned wages on a fashion accessory x This is no ordinary fashion accessory, but a handbag sent from heaven with the life changing powers that I believe no woman could honestly say they would turn down x Grown up full time working life is hard (so I’ve been told) and we could all do with a smile on our faces like Lily’s x so if cutting back on life’s little necessities (food, heating, friend’s birthday presents etc) is what it takes to help you towards this self assured confidence and unfaltering happiness, then all I can say is... ‘Paging Doctor Lagerfeld!’ x

Carrie Bradshaw: Dress Big, Dream Bigger...Or Just Compromise...Whatever

Admittedly, I was far too young to appreciate Sex And The City when it was first catapulted into people’s unsuspecting living rooms during the late 90s x Hell, let’s face it, at the tender age of 11, I realistically wouldn’t have been allowed...even if I had wanted to put down my Spice Girls CD and Premier League football sticker collection for 30 minutes x and anyway... the sex, cocktails, glamour and general fabulosity would have been entirely lost on my Minnie mouse legging, patent green bomber jacket wearing self x That was after all, long before the days of myself and my friends spending a ludicrous amount of educational minutes obsessing over drawing pictures of oh-so-trendy outfits for each other, that we would attempt to deceive many a bouncer in during the weekends (Please Note: We Failed.... sneaking into MacDonald’s to change coats/stealing older siblings car keys does NOT work) x

Anyway...I am older now, and every day I pray that I am slightly less embarrassing x One thing that I can safely say HAS changed is my SATC fancies x it is a programme that I now relish, the characters, the scenarios, the drama and especially, the fashion x Carrie Bradshaw in particular (along with Mario Testino) has given me faith in glamorous layering and eccentric style that burst with enviable personality....even a penchant for cutsie ankle socks that I could arguably have preserved from my pre SATC days x As a character, she is everything about fashion that I love, girly yet edgy, statementy, passionate and fantastical x Everything about the way she threw on a fur coat, sequin beret and pair of Jimmy Choo’s to hop, skip and jump across a snowy New Years infested New York City to get to her faltering friend in need, exudes the type of care free whimsical frippery that many long to have x

Here’s the catch though – I am almost entirely and absolutely EXCEEDINGLY vexed by the style queen herself, Carrie Bradshaw x there x I have said it x my name is Charlotte, and I am vexed be Carrie Bradshaw x Obvs – she is fabulous x but what I cannot and will not get passed is the fact that this is a woman who is part of a quartet of empowered females who taught us to dress big and dream bigger...but in Carries case...just compromise...whatever x Big is of course the operable word for Carrie x A man who waltzed into her life and wrapped her up in a frenzy of emotions, from love to sadness to love again over nearly a decade x Fine, relationships aren’t perfect and fairytales always have little holes in somewhere... x but the fact is, she compromised where no compromise was needed x THAT dress, THAT location and THOSE bridesmaids could not have been any more perfect...yes it is ultimately about being with the one you love...but this was HER day x Ok, so no one would have blamed Big for perhaps being confused or even slightly frightened by what appeared to be an exotic bird on her face, but jilting your bride at the alter??!!!!HELLO??!!WAS NO ONE ELSE WATCHING??! That is absolutely mortifying and in my mind the most cardinal of all sackable offences x The fact is, we ask for one day to become a real live princess and after that, we will become wives, mothers and grandmothers, working hard and loving harder to turn our lives and relationships into the happily ever after that we hope they will be x

So bah and humbug to you Carrie Bradshaw, for giving into the hapless male who pushed you from pillar to post to utter bewilderment, flaking and faltering until he finally pulled your dream out from under you and you just well....compromised x I do not doubt her magnitude as a style legend... she is certainly someone who I will continue to gain fashion inspiration from, but when it comes to lifestyle inspiration, I think I’ll just stick to my guns thanks x

The Supers

Daniel says I have interchangeable levels of annoyance/excitement x That is, when I say something ‘makes me die’, some interpretation is needed from the person on the receiving end of my outburst as to whether I am vexed, or in fact, delighted x With this is mind, I will begin x It was during my dreary Monday morning happenings that the aforementioned ambiguous outburst of emotion first occurred for the week x When stumbling upon this month’s Harpers Bazaar, I literally did nearly die as before my very eyes was the incredible, Cindy Crawford x Needless to say, from this point on – the usual mental battle that occurs between Vogue or Harpers was rendered forgotten x Alexa Chung vs Cindy Crawford?! X Exactly x One of the original Supers, she is a woman who personifies endurance, beauty, hard work and importantly femininity and true womanly magnificence x Looking at her on her on the front cover makes me just sigh – she looks, quite frankly, like sex x all flowing locks and pouty red lips, I defy anyone to find a man, woman or child who wouldn’t turn their head as she glided past them (Supers don’t walk in my head...) x What pleases me most about this cover, which is promoting an issue that celebrates women, is it seems to be screaming for the return of the Goddess x i.e more va-va voom please x It is a massive departure from seeing pretty, but skinny, pale, childlike and emaciated models on stage and screen who are closer to representing fashion orientated greyhounds than actual women x I’m not even talking about the old skinny vs size 10 debate, I’m talking about women who make me go – ‘I would literally die to look like her’ because they look and quite simply are, hot, sexy, radiant and timeless. Soz if this has all been said before x buts it important x and I think Harpers have proved that x Super Model? NO x Super Woman x Thank you Sara Buys for an ab fab piece on a Super legend – it made me die – in a good way x I hope the ‘Cindy Crush’ is here to stay!x